The Most Common Wedding Vows You Can Use

Your wedding vows are quite possibly the most important words you and your partner will ever say to each other. These are the vocalizations of your deepest feelings. And commitment towards each other, spoken for all those present to hear.

What you say during these few moments of your ceremony should convey your love for each other. Same as your obligation toward each other and your relationship.

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Most couples prefer to use traditional wording as the basis for their vows, then customize them here and there to suit their personalities.

Others wish to write their vows from scratch, preferring their artistic renderings rather than someone else’s words. However you want to proceed, we hope you find some helpful information below.

Traditional:

The term traditional wedding vows is misleading since it implies a written set of words that comprise a traditional vow, and all you have to do is add your names. While it is true that traditional vows may follow a similar format, the wording varies. Here are the most common, with Lisa as the bride and Michael as the groom (feel free to use your own names):

I, Lisa, take you, Michael, to be my lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part.

I, Michael, take you, Lisa, to be my lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part.

Non-Traditional:

Over the past few decades, wedding vows have evolved from slight variations of the above traditional vows to spanning the range of whatever a couple wishes to say. While some clergy may wish you to stay within a framework they have already set, most are willing to work with you to add your personal touches.

For those having ceremonies outside of an established religious institution, the options are limited only by your own imagination!

When sitting down to write marriage vows, most couples do it together. I’m sure we’ve all seen the movie or TV clips of the groom standing at the alter totally clueless.

Hopefully, major catastrophes should be averted by collaborating and contemplating the vows together. No one wants to have the newlyweds starting their married life together with a huge fight over the content of the vows.

Your wedding Vows Should be Written with Ease

Your wedding vows are so important for the Big Day – and for your marriage too! They are the rules of your future marriage, the promises you make to each other, and the very “soul” of your life as a married couple. And yet, as crucial as it may be, writing perfect wedding vows is not always as easy as it may seem from afar.

How to do it easily and in a stress-free way? Here are some ideas you will surely love:

Talk to the couples you really appreciate and from which you can learn.

Your parents, your grandparents, couples who have been together for longer than you – they already know how marriages work and what it takes to make them amazing.

They have already written and delivered their wedding vows (and they have stuck to them as well). Ask them about their inspiration for their wedding vows and “steal” some tips from the “pros”!

Talk to the Best Man or Maid of Honour. It is more than likely that he/she knows your loved one quite well, and he/she can give you great tips on what your future spouse would want to hear in your wedding vows.

Go away for an entire weekend, just the two of you. Spend time together, pamper each other, and refresh yourselves after so much wedding planning. Watch your favourite movies, listen to your favourite music and read your favourite books.

Infuse yourselves with the things that define you as a couple and the values you believe in.

It can be a great source of inspiration for your wedding vows!

Vows Can Take the Form of a Pledge

As in the more traditional type, a special passage from a book or poem that is meaningful to the couple. Or just a few words about your feelings for one another. You can even choose to say completely different things. Here are some examples:

I, Lisa, promise to love you, Michael, for all my life, to take care of you when you are sick, lift you up when you are down, and always listen more than I talk.

I, Michael, promise you, Lisa, to always love, cherish, and support you and to listen and speak with my heart.

Or for a more lighthearted vow…

I, Lisa, promise to never nag you, never to embarrass you in front of your friends, and to never make you go shopping on Super Bowl Sunday.

I, Michael, promise to never roll my eyes at you, never to leave my wet towel on the bed, and to never make you go shopping on Super Bowl Sunday.

Some of the most popular passages from the literature that are used for weddings are:

Come live with me and be my love,
And we will all the pleasures prove
That valleys, groves, hills, and fields,
Woods or steepy mountain yields.1

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

Love is patient and kind; love is not jealous or boastful; it is not arrogant or rude. Love does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrong but rejoices in the right. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.2

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of Being an Ideal Grace.
I love thee to the level of every day’s
The quietest need, by sun and candlelight.
I love thee freely, as men strive for right;
I love thee purely, as they turn from Praise.
I love thee with the passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood’s faith.
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose.
With my lost saints,–I love thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life!–and, if God choose,
I shall but love thee better after death.3
∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

Intreat me not to leave thee,
Or to return from following after thee:
For whither thou goest, I will go,
And where thou lodgest, I will lodge.
Thy people shall be my people,
And thy God my God.
Where thou diest, will I die,
And there will I be buried.
The Lord do so to me, and more also,
If ought but death part thee and me.4

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

May the road rise to meet you,
May the wind always be at your back.
May the sun shine warm upon your home,
The rains fall soft upon your fields.
And the light of friendship guide your paths together,
And until we meet again,
May you see your children’s children.
May you be poor in misfortune, Rich in blessings.
May you know nothing but happiness from this day forward.
May green be the grass you walk on.
May blue be the skies above you,
May pure be the joys that surround you,
May true be the hearts that love you.
And when eternity (can use God here) beckons, at the end of a life heaped high with love,
May you know the hand of a friend was always near.
And, today, may the Spirit of Love find a dwelling place in your hearts.5

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

Now you will feel no rain,
for each of you will be shelter for the other.
Now you will feel no cold,
for each of you will be warmth to the other.
Now there will be no loneliness,
for each of you will be a companion to the other.
Now you are two persons,
but there are three lives before you: his life, her life, and your life together.
Go now to your dwelling place to enter into your days together.
And may all your days be good and long upon the Earth. 6

∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞

I love you, not for what you are, but what I am when I am with you.
I love you not only for what you have made of yourself but what you are making of me.
I love you for the part of me that you bring out.

I love you for putting your hand into my heaped-up heart and passing over all the frivolous and weak things that you cannot help seeing there and for drawing out into the light all the beautiful and radiant things that no one else has looked quite far enough to find…

I love you because you have done more than any creed could have done to make me good and more than any fate could have done to make me happy.

You have done it without a touch, without a word, without a sign.
You have done it by being yourself.
Perhaps that is what being a friend means, after all.7

References:

1. from “The Passionate Shepherd to His Love” by Christopher Marlowe
2. from The Bible, Corinthians 13:4-8
3. from “How Do I Love Thee” by Elizabeth Barrett Browning
4. from The Bible, Ruth 1:16-17
5. Irish Blessing
6. Apache Wedding Prayer
7. from “I Love You” by Roy Croft

If you are looking for some ideas about wedding anniversary wishes, you can consider taking a look at our other post here And don’t forget to hire a professional photographer and videographer on your wedding day!

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